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My Bullying
Introduction This page is used to share my story of bullying. When I was in primary school and middle school, I did experience some kind of bullying at school. Although the bullying I experience was not in a very serious degree, it brought some negative effects on me, so I want to share my story here. Primary School First of all, I want to begin with my primary school life. When I was still at Grade 4, I got bullied by some of my classmates. Back to then, I was short and skinny. This was the reason why they picked me. All of them were stronger than me. They did not try to bully me verbally, but they choose to use a direct form of bullying. They hit me and kick me. Not frequently, but twice or three times a week. It was depending on their mood. I felt hurt and tried to protect myself, but I couldn't. I did not dare to tell my teachers. There were two things came in my mind. The first thing was I felt desperate because I was not able to protect myself and I felt weak both physically and mentally. The second thing was I was so nervous and worried if there is any consequences if I tell my teachers. Also, I was the kind of person that I wanted to face the difficulties by myself. The bullying lasted around a year, and something unexpected happened. Things get better later on. The bullies changed their behaviors. I also had some conversation with them. I found out that they think these kind of behaviors was not bullying. They see hitting others as "playing". However, the bullying happened to me did change my personalty. Not in a positive way, but negative. I did get depressed from this, and feeling nervous facing violence. I did not try to commit suicide or even thought of this anyway. I think because the bullying I received was not as serious as other cases. Middle School When I went to middle school. Bullying happened on me again. In middle school, there were actually much fewer bullies than in my primary school, because the kids had become more educated. Some people began to know attacking other is wrong, and most importantly, they realized they will be punished if they get caught. However, there were still some bullies. Though the teachers did know who the bad students were, they had no evidence of what the bullies were doing. Some teachers just did not even care about it. In the middle school, they changed they way of bullying. Verbal bullying became more common. It is because verbal bullying is less likely for them to get caught. I was not their only target. There were other students being bullied, because of our timidity, we did not report the matter. They were being disrespectful to us. We were threatened. They stole our textbooks. They were mess up our locker and teasing us. I guess not reporting the issue is probably one of the impact of being bullied. Victimized children like us began to lose bravery to dual with this. Plus, I thought the bullying were not so serious, so I sucked it up. Few Years later, because of their bad performance at school, they either get kicked out of school or drop out of the school few years later although they didn't seem care about this. The bullying ended when I went to high school. I did not get bullied, but I was still afraid of gangsters. I was afraid of being bullied again. College After high-school, I came to the United States and pursuing for my degree. I have been to three colleges. Base on my experience, I believe that when people are educated, they are less likely to bully others. I found the students in college are generally more polite and respectful. I haven't been bullied since I started college. Personally, I think the bullying issue is closely related to education. Highly-educated people are less likely to bully others. What I think about bullying Negative effects of being bullied * The victim might get permanent physically injured. * Loneliness, low self-esteem, and poor social relationships are the psychological problems that victimized children will likely to develop. * These children are at risk for problems like suicide, suicidal ideation, and non-suicidal self-injury. * Bullying can result in lower academic performance. The victimized student tend to truancy, absenteeism, and dropping out. * A sexual bullying might worsen to be a more serious crime such as sexual harassment or even rape. The effects listed above are based on the researches I did for the School Bullying Factsheet. In my angle of view, I agree all these impacts can be consequences of being bullied. After my experience of being bullied, my personality has changed. I had poor social relationship. I began to have problems like feeling isolated, having low self-esteem, and receiving bad grades at school. My personal feeling I have asked myself If I were them, would I do the same thing to bully my peers? My answer is No! It is because I know how it feels of being bullied, and I thought bullying is disgusting and disrespectful. Although study found that people who are being bullied are more likely to bully others, I think I am not one of those people. I guess the reason is because the bullying I received was not very serious comparing to others. At least, I did not get injured permanently. However, I still believe the school should be a safe place and no more bullying should happen. I have asked myself several time about what if I can go back then and how would I protect myself? If I could go back, I would have gain weight and try to be more outgoing. In my opinion, making friends would definitely be a good strategy to protect yourself from being bullied. Even if you do not report to teachers, finding some people to support you is needed. It seems difficult for every single person to deal with this alone. Finally, I can feel why some victims commit suicide. I understand it. Repeated bullying can brings one to darkness. External Links School Bullying Wordpress Blog School Bullying Factsheet Category:School Bullying